Two Poems by Michael Estabrook

 

 

the worst day ever in my life

Winter, first semester away at college,

I take the train on Saturday, like usual,

to my girlfriend’s school,

meet her in the dorm lobby.

She sits, quiet, not looking at me,

one pretty leg folded under,

a beautiful girl, so collegiate, so confident,

fresh as new winter snow.

“I’m so sorry, Mike” she says,

looking out through the window,

“But I can’t see you today.”

I didn’t see this coming, nope,

broadsided by this one.

We had been together

since high school, three years now,

and were serious, at least

I thought we were serious.

“I have a date today with another guy.”

My heart sinks like a stone

down to the bottom of the sea.

“I need to date other guys to be certain

you are the right one for me.”

I’m dumbfounded, shattered, I shrug.

What could I do? It is useless to protest.

But before leaving the campus

I go over to the cafeteria,

watch from an upper window

as she and her new boyfriend

come in for lunch, watch her giggling

and playful, throwing little snowballs

at her new beau, her lustrous

brown hair catching the sun.

 

 

 

 

Instead of trying to kiss and paw at her

 

I remember that dismal,

uncertain time in college

(lost in the mists of life’s dark,

tangled jungle)

when my wife

(my girlfriend then)

decided she needed to wander,

to date other guys. If instead

of trying to kiss and paw at her,

these short-sighted jackasses

(thank God for that)

would have been chivalrous

and caring, selfless and concerned

about what she thought and felt

and had to say, she might

have connected with something

in one of them, something

she admired and needed

and came to love, something

she has never found in me.

Things might have been

very different than they are today.

Certainly if she had dated another guy

even a handful of times

I wouldn’t be here right now.

 

 

 

Michael Estabrook is a baby boomer who began getting his poetry published in the late 1980s. Over the years he has published 15 poetry chapbooks, his most recent entitled “When the Muse Speaks.” His interests include history, art, music, theatre, opera, and his wife who just happens to be the most beautiful woman he has ever known.