Lies To Tell My  Body
My bones are  steel-heavy
as I walk the days with  it
Pores on my skin  ache
weighted by an iron-core  earth
pulling me towards  her
Down, she says, lay with  me
My eyes can't see  clear
turn skull-bound,  sinking
pregnant with  memory
The fibers in my  muscles
weep at their loss of  it
motion, forward,  direction
The nuclei in my  cells
pull and push  against-toward
refusing to agree with  you
Everyday, they keep  forgetting
why I can't just dial the  number
or drive 23 miles  northwest
My arms know the  exit-curves
(like the length of your  limbs)
my feet know how many steps  
(like the edge of your  sheets)
I don't need my eyes to  guide me
my hands, they know  where
But my heart knows to  stay
in my honey-thick  atmosphere
Lock the windows and  doors
breath it in, long  breaths
circulating it, the new  oxygen
Lie to my body, if need be  until
I don't need to remember  why
Present Affirmations  
I am almost ready
to be over this
I am almost ready
to see you clear
that you were never  really
good enough for  me
I am almost ready
to pick up the  pieces
I set aside
connect those  dots
to pull the curtains  open
to rip off the bed  sheets
flip all the light  switches
call you on your  bullshit
see you small
and entirely  pathetic
this lost puppy
is finding a new  home
so you can keep  that
old bitch who  returned
I will not be  laying
outside your door
I am almost ready
to tell you I'm too  busy
I don't have time  for
this fucked up  game
and I'm tossing  out
all the possible  scenarios
of your apology
of your seduction
of your returning
I'm done with it
I'm almost ready
I  am.
Sarah  Thursday was mostly raised in Long Beach, California.  She teaches 4th and  5th grade, is obsessed with music, and has only recently dove into poetry again.  She has forthcoming or has been published in Stylus Magazine, The Long Beach  Union (CSULB), The Atticus Review,  Eunoia Review, East Jasmine Review,  Yonic South, poeticdiversity, and  a project called Please Judge: Short Stories Based on the Songs of Roky  Erickson. She has also made five chapbooks over the years. Recently, she has  become the editor of Cadence Collective:  Long Beach Poets, almost by accident, but completely on  purpose.
 
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